Sunday, March 29, 2009

The Intruder....

Ahhh.....Friday night.....the work week is over and it's my time to sit back, relax and enjoy a fun, action-packed movie at home.

Adrenaline-pumping movie.......CHECK

Popcorn......CHECK

Comfy couch and snuggly blanket.......CHECK

Somthing flying over my head and creating shadows while landing behind my couch......CHECK

WHOA! WAIT A MINUTE!!!! WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS THAT??!

At first, I thought I imagined it.....maybe my mind is playing tricks on me?? Maybe this movie is just sooo exciting that I'm seeing things??? But...just in case...I grab a flashlight, carefully creep around the side of my couch, take a deep breath and shine the light behind there....

Nothing............*big sigh of relief*

Alright....back to the movie!!! (silly imagination....)

Comfy, cozy....unpause movie.......release tension from muscles.....

......WHAT JUST FLEW RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE!??


"It" lands......underneath the blinds.......I realize that it was, in fact, NOT my imagination....and there is a HUGE predator calmly preparing its' next attack maneuver....."IT" TAKES OFF AGAIN.....right in front of my face. I realize that I must get some plan of action, but my heart is pounding so hard that I can barely hear my own thoughts.

The intruder lands somewhere behind my dining table, so I take my chances and sprint back to my closet to grab my weapons of choice (aka, black flip-flops) I ease out of the bedroom.....into the living room.....my senses are on high alert and I can feel the hair sticking up all over my body.

All of a sudden, "it" jumps out of nowhere and flies into the kitchen and divebombs itself right behind the microwave...........great.........now...I get to carefully and strategically move every single thing away from the microwave (always holding one of my flip flops in one hand) I jostle the microwave several times......nothing.......(sly little devil)

After 30 minutes of waiting, flip-flops "at the ready", standing as still as a statue, talking to myself calmly......nothing....

So, I decide to try to get back to my movie....(just so you know....my apartment looks like it was hit by a tornado....everything in the kitchen is moved around, all the chairs from my dining room table are pulled out and near the wall...pillows are thrown around....pure madness)

I didn't have to wait long........after about 10 minutes of my movie, "it" makes its' ominous appearance once more....swooping around in circles......when......finally....it lands on my couch..........I inch up....slowly and steadily.....tightly gripping my "weapon"......and....WHAM!

VICTORY IS MINE!!!!!!

So....6 paper towels later (because I do NOT want to feel that bug as I scoop it up), I once again feel at ease in my own home. So glad I caught it........I was really not looking forward to sleeping in my car.......

Oh...it was like a big moth or something......I didn't want to look too closely....I don't like bugs!

7 comments:

Michelle said...

Holy Crap that was hilarious. Glad you survived. I was afraid it was going to be a bat!

A. B. England said...

I was thinking dirt diver or wasp, but it's too early in the year for those just yet. Glad you got him.

I've had to attempt to sleep in a room with a dirt diver or wasp constantly making attack runs at my head. (I had rose bushes just outside my bedroom window as a teen, and the windows weren't sealed well.) Seriously not fun!

Corie said...

Oh, I'm shuddering just thinking about it. I can't.stand.bugs.

And, my initial thoughts went to vampire flying in front of your face. Yeah, too much Twilight... ;)

Vera said...

Aaak! You had my heart pounding!

Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting said...

OMGoodness, I was so afraid you were going to say the S word. Then I'd die. lol

I. Do. Not. Like. Bugs.

Shelly said...

Oh my golly, that is gross! I had a huge bug behind my bedroom blinds that was making this really loud freaky noise and my hubby went and got the bug spray and went to town. We couldn't sleep in the bedroom that night because it smelled of spray and we couldn't breathe!

I hate bugs! I'm sure God knows what He was thinking...but bugs need to stay outdoors where they belong!

Summer said...

You won the book! Email me your address and I get the book out to you!

summer@lemusingsofmoi.com